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As a general practitioner in alternative medicine, I encounter all kind of people every day. One of those are the chronic illness patients, “weird disease” patients or “unexplained conditions”. These are all difficult and tricky cases. Please note that when I talk about difficult, it is not something like terminal stage of cancer or life threatening kind of difficult, but in general, more of a low quality of life and chronic suffering state.
Most of the times in those cases, I am sure that I have a lot to offer. I have seen sicker, weaker and more complicated diseases. But it comes to a sick “man”, the story is different.
If a disease is the broken car part, then a sick man is the driver behind the wheel. Usually, I can find a way to fix the part or find the solution to make it functional again, but I cannot control how a person drives or when someone who owns an old car expecting to get a Ferrari.
For those chronic sufferers and their caregivers, if you want to find an ultimate way out and the right track to get back to health, please take time to read and digest what I am about to share.
Wisdom, the beginning of cure
For those who are suffering so much for a long time would want to get recovery as soon as possible. This is exactly why you should keep your head cool and think rationally. Get yourself faith and wisdom to guide yourself out, not money nor emotions nor fantasy.
Biggest enemies: anger and fear
You might think that your doctor gave you the wrong medication or did not give you a cure or the treatment itself brings more pain and suffering than the disease itself. It is common for a human being to be angry about the situation and have fear. However, darkness does not light up darkness. Overcome your fear, cope with the disappointment of failed treatments. Believe that all doctors are under the Hippocratic Oath who do not intend to bring you harm.
Magical pill does not exist
I understand that it is painful and frustrating to be sick all the time. You probably do not see a way out. And you might have seen many doctors, specialists or alternative medicine but you are still sick. You might be skeptical about everything and yet you still want to look for a solution. This is exactly the vulnerable time that you will be touched by some medical advertisement.
Unlike many TCM clinics, I never advertise my treatment to be side effects free. When there is effect, there could be side effect, as simple as that. Also, sometimes you need to break a bone to fix the bone. So yes, there could be some painful process. Finally, your body takes 20 years of time for you to grow into full adulthood. Unfortunately, accident or disease can ruin everything in one night. You need to allow time and process for your body to regrow and recovery in a much longer time. Yes, it is unfair but it is the way it is.
Stop being a “Know-it-all” patient
Let’s face it, if you have already known it all, you do not need to seek help from others. You should have fixed your problem and living happily and healthy by the time being.
It actually sounds weird to me that when someone is sick, instead of resting or taking care of themselves, they try to do researches or study medicine. I remember my time as a med-student who spent 5 years of 70 hours per week on studies and months as the bottom-of-the-food-chain intern in the hospital. Are you sure that you want to do this when you are sick?
Please don’t get me wrong. I am not putting that “I am a doctor and you are not” arrogance. The point being here, is that you should set your priority and target right and realistic. The true learning process should always start with a peaceful mind and humble heart. This is the right direction. When you purpose of learning or research is to find a quick fix or to prove your doctors’ incompetence, believe me, I have seen many of these people end up continuing to be wandering, lost and sick.
It is okay and necessary to learn even at the time that you are sick, as long as they are guiding you towards truth and wisdom.
Your family and friends are kind but good intentions could harm
Seeing somebody that suffers is indeed a suffer, especially when they are people that you care and love. People around the sick person could be just as eager and anxious for them to get better. However, the road to hell is paved with good intentions. They need to learn to cope with the situation just as much as the sick person does. You do not need to take every piece of their advice but do be a bit more understanding, forgiving and appreciating.
The power of “just being”
What ever happened to get you to this point is done. Accepting what it is, instead of getting caught up in wishing that things were different. But never lose hope and stop your addiction to failure. “I have been through this, there is always ups and downs and I am now back to the down”. If your subconsciousness somehow thinks that you are not going to get better, I promise you, you will not get better.
Forget about what you want, and start thinking what you need. Things might go back to how it used to be or they might not. If you cannot work like before, then try to work in a new way. If you cannot walk, then try using your arms. There is always something you can do.
Sometimes great things look simple and silly. Take what you can get and let every single step counts, no matter how small it is. I often have people complaining something like “yes, my [ … ] is now better and my [ … ] is fine, but my [ … ] is still the same (fill in the blanket with any symptoms)”. As the saying goes, anything before a BUT does not count. Why are you being so harsh on yourself? Let me put it this way: a schoolboy who always get a straight F on their report cards now finally get 2 Ds, why should you focus on the failure and crash your confidence?
Finally, let persistence and faith guide you through
The real confidence and courage is not the absence of fear; it's the willingness to face the darkness and difficulties. Yes, there was ups and downs and there will always be. It is life. Start facing it so you can start living.
Traditional Chinese medicine works in a way of being in harmony with the nature. Imagine your body as a miniature ecosystem. Somehow some wrongdoings or accidents damaged this system and you are now sick. The right way to fix it is simple:
stop those wrongdoings, whether it is smoking, skipping meals or not getting enough sleep. You need to have discipline.
Find ways to regrow your system, put back the energies that you are lacking and clean off the toxins.
And most importantly, let the system takes the necessary time and steps. Somehow a drying desert will not turn into a fruitful forest in 3 months.